An untimely fate I did meet.
At the pearly gates, who did greet
But Saint Peter, attentive on his feet,
Who calmly told me, “Take a seat.”
“Before you enter, there’s one last thing.”
Was it something I had to bring?
A review of all my lying?
Good deeds tallied before dying?
As if he could read my thoughts,
He simply shook his head no.
“It’s your passwords we must review
Before I let you go.”
“My passwords?” I scoffed.
“What could they possibly tell?”
He looked me straight in the eyes:
“They provide the greatest intel.”
“ButtFace9 — that’s quite the line.”
“I was just a kid back then,
Simply speaking my mind.”
“MrNorrisIsADork — interesting work.”
“I needed extra letters…
And he really was a jerk.”
“NataliesHot — an apostrophe there’s not”
“She said hi to me once…
But I never took my shot.”
“CanOWhoopAss, that’s a tad crass”
“It was my wrestling phase
Only a couple of years did it last”
“Poop.Fart — not exactly high art.”
“That one still makes me chuckle.
Sophomoric humor plays its part.”
“BeersMyFriend — how do you defend?”
“Blame it on peer pressure.
Binge drinking was the trend.”
“I think I’ve seen enough.”
“Please, let me rebuff.”
“Sorry, son — these decisions are tough,
And the outcomes can be rough.”
“What is my fate?”
Saint Peter looked at me straight,
Paused for a second — I hated the wait.
Then, with a wink and a smile he:
OpenedTheGate
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