Say No To No

During a time of seemingly unlimited possibilities, education can feel strangely stagnant. Venturing outside the tried and true is rare—and sometimes dangerous. Not physically dangerous, but lose-your-job dangerous.

And let’s be honest, it’s often more tried than true, because the results in education are… well… pretty mediocre.

Wyatt Earp (Kurt Russell) telling Curly Bill (Powers Booth) “No” over and over again before he kills him in Tombstone.

A Tommy Boy montage of Richard (David Spade) frustratingly watching Tommy (Chris Farley) repeatedly take “no” for an answer.

And finally, Lost’s John Locke (Terry O’Quinn) getting denied his walkabout while vehemently screaming, “Don’t tell me what I can’t do!”

Normally, there would be a little more substance tied to the video clips. But for the purposes of this post, all I needed were some cool scenes of people saying—or hearing—“no.”

Implications for Education

There are two lessons here:

1. Stop telling people no.
2. When people tell you no, don’t always listen to them.

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Stop Telling People No

Nothing breaks my spirit faster than someone immediately shooting down an idea.

It’s like “no” is already in the holster, and when I step around the corner, I’m already on the ground. They didn’t even listen.

Before an idea is shared, it is usually pondered, researched, processed, and second-guessed. It takes courage to put yourself out there. An immediate dismissal can be devastating.

Ask yourself:

Why am I closed to this new idea?

• Is it because I’m afraid to try something outside my comfort zone?
• Is it because the idea isn’t mine?
• Is it because we’ve always done it another way?

Notice that all of these reasons center on the naysayer’s feelings and emotions.

Decisions about new ideas shouldn’t be filtered through the lens of what is safe for me, but rather through the question: What is best for kids?

Now, having concerns about an idea is perfectly reasonable. But your initial response should not be dismissal.

Instead, you might:

• Ask questions
• Make suggestions
• Offer constructive feedback

Questions, suggestions, and feedback help move an idea forward.
A quick “no” kills it before it even gets started.

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Don’t Accept No

Presenting a new idea for the first time is intimidating.

Knowing that colleagues may immediately dismiss it (see section above) can actually be helpful. Most people don’t reject ideas because they lack merit. More often, they reject them because change forces self-reflection, and self-reflection can be uncomfortable.

It’s important to plan how you’ll respond to a less-than-enthusiastic reception.

When someone says no:

• Ask why
• Ask for feedback
• Ask for questions
• Ask for input
• Ask “What if?”

If your idea worked, what would the benefits be?

Often, new ideas unintentionally challenge existing ones. If your proposal replaces an old practice, people may hear something you never said:

Are you saying what we’ve been doing is bad? Ineffective? Obsolete?

Whether that is true or not, your idea can force people to reflect on their own practices. And no one likes to believe the work they’ve been doing might not be helping students—or worse, might be hurting them.

Change is hard for everyone.

Routines are comfortable. Habits are powerful. A new idea might require someone to:

• work harder
• learn a new skill
• invest more time

Education does not stagnate because people have bad ideas. It stagnates because too many ideas never survive their first “no.” The future of schools won’t be shaped by the people who protect the past—it will be shaped by the people willing to question it. So listen longer before dismissing someone else’s idea, and when your own idea is challenged, don’t walk away too quickly. Sometimes the most important progress begins with someone quietly thinking:

“Don’t tell me what I can’t do.”