I bite my nails.
It’s not a bad habit.
I just don’t use nail clippers.

I had a dog once.
I bought a pair of clippers,
cut too deep,
saw blood.
I never used them again.

She used to cut nails on Saturdays.
An assembly line:
one boy, then the next, then one more.
They fought to go first,
to get it over with.

Without her, there’s more to do.
I do the laundry.
I take them to the dentist and the doctor.
I sign their report cards.

But I can’t
clip their nails.

Everyone has problems.
Personal and professional,
Simple and complex.

But there’s something about problems.
They don’t have to be negative.
They don’t have to be all bad.

Problems are meant to be faced.
They’re meant to be solved,
To be thought through,
To be worked on.

Problems make you learn.
They make you better.
They make you stronger.

They prepare you
For future problems.

What People Think

Okay, maybe this reads like a Top 10 list from MTV Cribs, but it captures something real: the unfortunate desire to acquire material wealth not just to enjoy it, but to display it. Status over substance.

“Dave, are you going to say something sappy about family and friends?”
“Yes. Yes, I am.”

Continue reading “How Do You Know if You’ve Made It?” →

A little over ten years ago, I was with my two brothers at the Final Four (brag). At that point in our lives, we were all married, kids were right around the corner (fast-forward to now and there are nine of them), and we had each settled into solid careers. Our conversation bounced from the weekend’s semifinals, to the potential of the Alien vs. Predator universe, to childhood stories, and—naturally—to our dad. He was supposed to join us for this “One Shining Moment” weekend, but his flight wasn’t landing until later that night.

Talking about Dad was the logical end point after reliving our childhood antics. So many of our stories ended the same way: getting caught by Dad, getting punished by Dad, or getting yelled at by Dad. They’re funny now—much funnier than they were in the moment.

Our father was old school. He grew up tough and he was tough on us. Before anyone feels too sorry for me, I should say I grew up extremely privileged: solidly middle class, great suburb, great schools. By “tough,” I don’t mean hardship—I mean expectations. Dad wasn’t the “I love you” type. If you did nine out of ten things right, he focused on the one you got wrong. And believe me, in his mind it was definitely you who messed up. His yell was scary, but the gritted teeth and cocked head were even scarier. When we screwed up, we went to Mom… and we prayed she wouldn’t tell Dad.

My junior year of high school, I took a computer programming class. I wasn’t particularly interested in coding; I was interested in stockpiling college credits. My guidance counselor knew this and recommended the course when we planned my schedule the previous semester.

Two buddies, Adam and Dan, had the same idea. (Although, if memory serves, Adam might’ve actually liked coding—but it’s been so long, I can’t say for sure.) The three of us enrolled together. We already knew the teacher, Mr. Matherson, from Course III Math. I think he realized immediately that we weren’t excited about the class, but we were good students, and he knew we could handle the work. He didn’t give us too hard a time.

The roster was mostly seniors—many of them planning to study computer science in college. Adam, Dan, and I weren’t wildly popular, but we played sports and were friendly with most of the popular kids. That gave us an unreasonable amount of confidence—borderline cockiness.

Erase
Not right
One more try
Can’t make a mistake
Still feels a bit confusing
It’s close, but not quite there
Maybe if I change this part here
Why must perfection be so difficult
I have to meet the world’s expectations
Finished! All will see the beauty I created

Trash.

Is perfectionist the right description if my work isn’t any good?

Have you ever been on the receiving end of a wrong decision?
Been treated unfairly?
Lost when you should have won?
Had a mistake made at your expense?
Found yourself the victim of unfortunate circumstances?

If you’re human, the answer is yes — to all of the above. We’ve all felt the sadness, disappointment, anger, and frustration that come when life tilts unfairly against us.

But here’s the thing: life is unfair.
The trick isn’t to deny that — it’s to avoid living there. The faster we move forward, the faster we heal.

Unfortunately, I see too many people using past victimhood as a lifetime permission slip — a reason to justify any and all behavior that follows.

The number of students requiring additional support can feel overwhelming. But adopting the mindset of saving one at a time might just get us there.

*This video contains graphic images*

Based on a true story, Hacksaw Ridge tells the incredible journey of Desmond Doss, a World War II medic and conscientious objector who refused to carry a weapon or take another man’s life. During the Battle of Okinawa—one of the bloodiest in the Pacific, with over 160,000 combined casualties—Doss carried 75 wounded men to safety, earning him the Medal of Honor.

In one unforgettable scene, Desmond drags injured soldiers from the battlefield and lowers them down a cliff to safety. After each rescue, he prays, “Please, Lord, help me get one more.”
Had he focused on the enormity of the battle, he likely would have been paralyzed by the scale of suffering around him. Instead, by focusing on one man at a time, he saved seventy-five lives.

8 Mile is to Michigan as Canandaigua is to New York. One backdrop created a Hall of Fame lyricist, and the other produced some guy named Marshall Bruce Mathers. Okay, so maybe my St. Baldrick’s lyrics don’t stack up to Eminem’s — but at least mine are for a good cause.

The name BlogGaud was inspired by Eminem’s Rap God. Not the lyrics, but the title itself. I was listening to the song during a recent morning run (brag), when I caught a line I’d somehow missed before:

“I bully myself ’cause I make me do what I put my mind to.”

That lyric stuck with me. It reminded me of my earlier post, I Can’t Let People Down, which was all about the pressure I feel to do right by others — my family, my coworkers, my students. Slim’s “bully” line, on the other hand, sounds like the pressure he puts on himself — the drive to live up to the greatness he knows he’s capable of. Two very different motivations, but both coming from within. One is a push to be the best, and the other is a pull to be your best for others.

If you wake up at 5 A.M., you’re going to want to put on your workout clothes.
When you finish getting dressed, you’ll want a tall glass of water.
Once you’ve drained your glass, you’ll remember to step outside for natural sunlight.
And if you’re heading outside for sunlight, you’ll probably take your dog with you.
Since your dog’s outside, he’ll convince you to go for a morning run.
When you finish your run, you’ll want to jot a few notes in your gratitude journal.
Now that you’re sweaty and grateful, you’ll need a cold shower.
Once you’re clean and alert, you’ll sit down for some deep work.
After your first focus block, you’ll want a 10-minute walk to reset your mind.
Then you’ll dive back into another round of deep work until the day winds down.
When you get home, you’ll want to step outside again to catch the sunset.
After the sunset, you’ll start your wind-down routine.
Once you’re calm and ready, you’ll crawl into bed.
And chances are, if you sleep for seven to nine hours,
you’ll wake up at 5 A.M.… ready to do it all again.

It’s fine to be selfish through much of your life,
But all is transformed when your children arrive.
You give them your all, as to never deprive,
But not too easy, kids benefit from strife.
A delicate balance, the edge of a knife,
Both praising and guiding, you help them to thrive.
Through stumbles and lessons, they feel more alive,
Yet still in some parents, self-interest runs rife.

Unwilling to change for the sake of their kids,
Late nights and long travels. Routines? Not a chance.
They drag them along with their half-closed eyelids,
Too young to cry “stop,” children stuck in a trance.
With no sense of rhythm, home life hits the skids—
Self-centered parents led to this circumstance.

“Proper preparation prevents poor performance.” But, “Proper preparation does NOT ensure superior performance (missing a few “p” words).

Coaches

Game planning is invaluable. Most football teams script their first set number of plays. With game footage, advanced analytics, and an understanding of the opposing team’s personnel, it would show incompetence for a coach not to create unique schemes in preparation for each opponent.

What separates the successful coaches from the journeymen is the ability to make in-game adjustments. The probability that an opponent will do exactly everything that you anticipated is zero. The probability that your players will perform every thing that they practiced perfectly is zero. And when both things inevitably happen, that’s when coaches coach (super deep).

Booking the cheapest airline for my trip
Hidden fees complicate the endeavor 
Overwhelming stress tightening its grip
Employing travel hacks to be clever

Discovering a cost-effective deal
Only concern is the high baggage fee
An airlines legal maneuver to steal
So how to get the low cost guarantee?

Then, I recall "Haven" the service dog
She flew free as an aid to her owner
My mind begins an inner dialogue
Yes! How to save as a trekking loner 

Clearly, emotional luggage I need
Without it (for free), too nervous I'd be