Seasoned parents know that when facing a stubborn child, providing choices works miracles.
“I’m not brushing my teeth!”
“Do you want to brush your teeth before you tuck in your lovey or after?”
“Broccoli is disgusting!”
“Do you want your carrots mixed in with your broccoli or do you want to eat them separately?”
“I hate going to the grocery store!”
“Would you rather wear your crocs to the store or your Lightning McQueen shoes?”
The lyrical genius Robert Matthew Van Winkle once said, “If there was a problem, yo, I’ll solve it.”
A surge of dopamine accompanies the solving of a problem. You deserve it, having helped others with your diligence and hard work. Unfortunately, chasing the dopamine hit may lead to problem fabrication: fixing a problem that didn’t exist or recognition seeking after solving a problem that was self-created.
You don’t like how management schedules team meetings. You believe that all team members should have input in determining meeting dates and times. You make a big to do about the poll you created to find the perfect meeting time. Several days later, poll results vary, and a few individuals have not bothered to respond to your visually stunning questionnaire. Management should have picked a date and time, and moved on.
Continue reading “Problem Fabrication”
Socctopus – The soccer parent with arms in everything
"Communicate with each other!"
Too bad they can't hear over the fans
Contradict the coach
It's a shame that you are too busy (you told us) to coach the team yourself
Fall out of your lawn chair exasperated while tracking a missed shot
We all thought your overly dramatic body language would bend the ball into the net
"Stop bunching up!"
Glad someone identified the problem
"You're offsides!"
That should be sufficient to help 7 year olds develop spatial awareness
Provide them with Ecto Cooler and gas station Hostess confections after the game
Thankful that your tactical soccer knowledge carries over to sports nutrition
What do you do with a complainer?
If you listen, they complain more
If you ignore, they complain about you
If you put two together, they unite
If you separate, they infect
If you complain about them, you're the complainer
If you put them in a room full of puppies...
You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end — which you can never afford to lose — with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be. – Admiral James Stockdale
Admiral James Stockdale was a highly decorated Navy pilot who, after being shot down and captured in Vietnam, spent nearly eight years as a prisoner of war. He is best known for the “Stockdale Paradox,” which emphasizes the importance of confronting the most difficult realities of a situation while maintaining unwavering faith in the eventual positive outcome.
Thankfully, people do not need to overcome the atrocities of a Vietnamese prison camp. Double thankfully, we can benefit from understanding the Stockdale Paradox without having to experience the atrocities of a Vietnamese prison camp.
Continue reading “Stockdale Paradox”
Confidence improves effectiveness
“Homer at the Bat” is a classic Simpsons episode. Even though Homer is having an MVP caliber season playing for the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant softball team, manager/boss, Mr. Burns, brings in ringers to ensure the team wins him a championship.
Major League Baseball star Darryl Strawberry takes over Homer’s position in right field. In this short scene, Homer first meets Darryl. Darryl, having never met Homer before, is still certain that he is the better baseball player. For an obscure scene, it is one I remember often.
Continue reading “Confidence”
“What do you do outside of work to relax?”
“I enjoy reading, working out, and playing with my dog.”
False! You don’t read. You stopped working out on January 8th. You yell at the dog for taking too long to poop.
Bread is the staple food for all humanity (just go with me).
There’s one bread chain, “Yeast of All” (nailed it), that provides all the bread.
There are two rival bread camps; Banana and Pumpkin (the only two breads served).
Banana claims that in Loaf City, Yeast of All is stocking considerably more Pumpkin bread than Banana bread.
Banana sends in the Flour Power Task Force to ensure bread equity.
Videos are posted of Flour Power storming into different Yeast of Alls, throwing, burning, and tearing up Pumpkin bread.
Tension grows across the land as Banana and Pumpkin feud.
I don’t watch the news because it is too negative. Dozens of words, phrases, and people are muted/blocked on my X feed, because their purpose is to anger, outrage, or disgust.
With all my safeguards, I can’t escape stumbling on a “Karen” video (a woman, often white and middle-aged, behaving in an entitled or confrontational manner). It was funny the first time, now it’s depressing.
The problem is that Karen videos are far more prevalent than positive news, even when you try to engineer your social media to skew towards the optimistic. Part of the problem is the catchiness, trendiness, and ubiquitousness of the word Karen in the modern vernacular (a sentence riddled with SAT words that reads like it was generated with a thesaurus in hand…sorry Ms. Albright [11th grade English teacher]). What if there was an alternative?
I am introducing Stewarts & Roses, the anti-Karens. Why two? I think it is important to have positive representation for men and women.
Continue reading “Stewarts & Roses”
Disclaimer – This post is nuanced. Read carefully as it may appear to contradict Asking and Answering Questions.
I welcome feedback, questions, criticisms (scoff, [I actually say scoff instead of making a scoff-like sound] like there’s anything to criticize), and suggestions. However, there are situations where I do not gather commentary from staff.
Continue reading “Just Say Okay”
How is the book?
I connected with the protagonist
How is the show?
Every character is likable
How is the movie?
I want them to end up together
How is the job?
Family life is busy – Cooking, cleaning, school, extracurricular activities, pet care, etc. With two working parents, it’s impossible to do all the things all the time. A support network of family and friends is paramount. Support systems can provide childcare, pet sitting, chauffeuring, help with emergencies, and other familial needs. Healthy networks are symbiotic. However, if a network participant is parasitic, they disrupt the entire ecosystem.
Why do some people take advantage of their supports? I don’t know the answer as I’m not a parasite (at least I hope not), but I have thoughts.
The difference between being naive and a jerk is about empathy. If you don’t understand empathy, and constantly impose on your system of support, you’re naive. If you understand empathy, but continue to impose on your system of support, you’re a jerk.
The difference between being lazy and ignorant is about education. If you don’t understand the value of doing more in support of/with/for your family, you’re ignorant. If you understand the value of doing more in support of/with/for your family, but choose not to, you’re lazy.
Everyone agrees that it takes a village to raise a child. If you take advantage of that village, you risk burning it down.
Hank the Brass Mole strides to the bus stop. Upon rounding the corner, Hank runs into Stuart.
“I forgot my lunch!” cries Stuart. “Will you tell Melanie the Bus Driver to wait for me?”
“Absolutely,” assures Hank.
Stuart quickly disappears around the corner. Hank finishes the short walk to the end of the block where the school bus is waiting.
Hank bounds up the three bus steps in one leap.
“Where’s Stuart?” asks Melanie.
“I think he’s sick,” shrugs Hank.
Continue reading ““Don’t Be A Brass Mole””
Hard work pays off.
The ends justify the means.
Sweat equity yields dividends.
BUT SOMETIMES
Predetermined outcomes,
Subjectivity,
& Luck,
FACTOR IN.
Life doesn't owe you.
Due has nothing to do with it.
Forget fair.
DESERVE IS A STUPID WORD
